Anxiety Attack

I had a mini anxiety attack today....hate it when those happen...but the fact that it did kind of freaks me out...it was because of this story that someone told me...about someone that i really care about...i started to hypervenilate and my heart was beating fast and i felt tears in the back of my eyes building up...and i felt stuck, cemented to the spot that my body occupied...

and it pretty much passed just as quickly as it came on...but Jesus, it was freaky...

And now here I am, trying to process where exactly all of that shit came from...I need to detach, let go...separate myself from that...I have no part in that, I have no leverage there...what I say doesn't hold any value anymore. I thought I had processed things for the most part...but this anxiety shows me I've still got a way to go...time

Maybe it's because I've got quite a bit about me figured out and I thought that this other person did too...at least, to a certain extent I was lead to believe that they did...but their actions say otherwise...
the only judgment I'm passing here is that things are changing - and the changing is hard for me to understand. It's not 'right' or 'wrong'...it's just a change and something I need to accept. Whether I agree with it or not is not really the issue here...

I need to stop working at EconoFoods


Goodnight...tomorrow (today) is FRIDAY!